Eternally Thankful...

My bags (3 huge ones) are packed and I'm all ready for my annual In-Camp-Training (ICT). My laptop's blasting great music and I am still wide awake even at this hour.

I am suddenly reminded by God's faithfulness and the blessings He has poured upon me throughout these years. Especially for that of my first ICT.

Close friends will know that the ICT period of last year was when I went through what is probably the most troubled and tumulus time of my life. Last year's ICT was right smacked in the middle of Semester 5 of my undergraduate life. It was in the middle of project commitments, mid-semester tests, tons of administrative work for applications for my exchange to US. Semester 5 was a killer semester with arguably the toughest modules of the undergraduate curriculum.

Furthermore the only grandparent I ever knew passed away on the second day of the ICT. My dear Gramm. I was devastated. I was not even anywhere remotely close to her when she left this world. I was distracted and detached. Losing someone this close without the ability to do anything about it, without the ability to be with the family immediately in this time of grief, without the ability to comfort those she left behind, is one of the worse experiences ever. I was unable to carry out my duties to the best of my abilities, unable to concentrate on the lectures (both in ICT and in SIM), unable to keep up with school work and projects, unable to do pretty much anything non-menial. I was lost in my despair and sorrows. I will never forget that period of time.

But God you forsee what was going to happen and You have already placed guardians by my side in this most challenging and difficult time of my life. You for one have brought Gramm to a better place and I am really glad that she knew you before she left. You placed above me good direct commanders who are able to understand my plight and grant me leave to be with my family and to send Gramm off. You provided me with XinYi, my quiet comforter, who is able to in my stead be with my family and carry out the duties back home that I can't when I am back in camp. You blessed me with my two awesome brothers who were the pillars of strength for the whole family this period, overseeing all the details for Gramm's funeral. You provided me with ICT mates who live nearby, who facilitated my otherwise long travels to the camp and back. You provided me with good classmates, who carried my share of project work, kept me updated with school work, who took notes for me, and assisted my exchange applications till I was able to complete my ICT. You gave me good cousins who were able to get off work the whole week to stay in my house to help out with all the funeral proceedings. You put by my side, good friends who sent messages of comfort and in their own ways supported me in this difficult period. More importantly, You gave me and my family, especially Mom, the courage, belief and strength to move on.

1 year on, with a smooth first ICT, decent grades for Semester 5, and a fulfilling exchange in USA, I smile as I type out this post. I can thank You God for a million other things. But its in times as such that the footprints in my life is more visible and tangible. I understood more clearly than ever, for the first time, the phrase "it was then that I carried you".

Thank You God for being there always. May You continue to shape and guide my life according to Your will.

I know I am going to have yet another great ICT. =)