html PUBLIC "-//W3C//DTD XHTML 1.0 Strict//EN" ""> I Need an Invention, Intention, to stop Temptation to Scream...: March 2005

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Me and my army thoughts- In a few words or pics

This is me. I am fat and I am lazy. I am rarely motivated, especially to study. I seldom move about and do so only when I have to (Eat or Go potty). The whole world says I'm lazy. But I love myself. :)

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Life was good before I was forced to join Ass-Ay-Eff. I was able to do what I love all day long. I seldom studied and this is how I'd probably looked at lecture halls, classrooms or libararies as my friends can testify. Oh. I forgot to add. This is also how I would look like at home most of the time too.

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I also spend a great deal of my time with the one I love most, that is my dearest buddy-for-life, soulmate-forever and of course my lovely girlfriend. She would always encourage me to work hard and seldom loses her patience at a can-be-quite-irritating-at-times guy like me. I enjoyed every moment I have spent with her. 3 years together already and many more years to come I'm sure. I LOVE YOU DEAR!

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Of considerable note, I spend a fair amout of time online, just chatting with good friends online makes my day. I also love blogging which in my perspective is now one of my many hobbies. I am constantly amazed by the number of things that can be done online. Too bad I'm a computer idiot. If not I'd probably be a hacker. Hahaha.

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My world crashed when I received enlistment orders. Been slaving for the nation since eventful Feb 17, 2004. I had to give up many things that I held on so dearly too. Rights like the freedom to wake up at anytime I want now becomes a privilege. It can be frustrating especially when many of my weekends have been burnt doing countless duties. Many a times I just feel like throwing my hands up in the air and giving up.

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I always look at myself in the mirror and asked what all teenage dudes upon enlistment would ask. "Why, why why why must be me? Why CMPB never forget my name? Why I so suay born in Spore? Why?" I guess those questions can or will never be answered.

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I miss civillian life so much. There are so many things I am not able to accomplish due to Nation Slavery(NS). I miss all the things I used to do. I missed my own messy room and comfy bed. But most of all I miss my family and friends sorely. I hope they missed me too.

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But all in all I hope I have became a better person. Although there are many things that have not gone my way since NS, I tend to look on the bright side and be thankful and content with small things such as this 3 day off break that enables me to blog and spend some time with my loved ones. The army does not make you discover the things that you lack. Instead the army makes you rediscover what you already have and teaches you how to treasure it. Because what you have now may not be yours again tomorrow. Period.

It was not a complete waste of time as I would have thought. At least I have learnt BCCT and ICCT (Basic and Intermediate Close Combat Training). So watch out for my right-hand pull back guarding block. HIYAH!

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Now life in the army is more or less settled. I am able to adapt and get use to the nature of my slack job scope. Life is getting beautiful. At least I am now paid back for all the weekends that I have burnt with offs. I consider myself fortunate and privileged in having a chance to churn out wholesome recruits from my alma mater and school-renowned MOHAWK company.

Life in BMTC as an instructor is really fun. There are tough times but there are also relaxing moments. Still, no matter how good army life now is, I cannot wait till I ORD. Nothing beats civillian life. No rank beats the biggest rank of all. The thought of being called MR. Shaun Foo instead of 3SG Shaun Foo is a thought that I fantasised about daily and a thought that I would have died for.

The day when I ORD is the day when I spread my wings and fly. Away from the cursed island of Pulau Tekong. I can't wait to meet new challenges in life. Bring em on I'd say!

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I really cannot wait.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

All in a day's work

Yes I'm back from work thanks to a mid-week off that I applied for. Time to chill out a little while and catch up with some friends before a boring Commanders training on friday and COS duty (yes its me again but dun ask me why) on saturday. At least I only have 3 COS duty for next month. YEAH. Say it with me, COS SUCKS!

Well I'm not here to grumble bout' my duties but rather to share an interesting encounter in my "work" yesterday. ( COS means Company Official Slacker)

I was mindlessly watching Terminator III in the company office when suddenly the phone rang.


Sigh. I paused the dvd player and walked over to the phone.

Me(in false cheery voice): "Good afternoon, Mohawk COMPANY"

Unknown : "Erm did anyone call my handphone juz now ah?"

Me(puzzeled look) : "No mam, no one called you, you are miss..?"

Unknown : "I am Mrs.Ng. Sure no one called me ah?"

Me(exasperated look) : "Yes, I'm sure mam' no one called you."

Mrs.Ng : "Erm ok. Must be wrong number. By the way ah, what does your COMPANY deal in?"

Me(tongue-in-cheek): "RECRUITment mam."

Mrs.Ng: "Orh. Ok. Bye bye."

Hahaha. Recruitment. Ignorant aunties. Heh.
All in a day's work I guess.

Catcha again dudes and dudettes!

Sunday, March 27, 2005

A bird in hand is worth.....

This was a hilariously funny situation that happened last week. The only reason why I took so long to compose this entry is because I've juz learnt the use of Photobucket .Muwahahaha. Say hello to more picture filled entries from now on.

It happened one sunny morning when Peter found a bird incapable of flight hobbling outside our company office. It seemed to have either injure its wings or legs. Therefore kind sergeant Peter picked up the bird happily and started patting it affectionately on its forehead.

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The proud "rescurer" of the injured birdie.

Then came along kapo sergeant Farhan and myself. "Ahh! So cute!" went Farhan. "So poor thing! Lemme see!" We then took turns to cuddle the cute little bird in our palms, at the same time posing for a picture or two.

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Kapo Kias wanting a piece of em.

The cute bird mentioned looks like this. Looks fake but I guarantee you that it is real. Does anyone knows what species of the winged family does this bird belongs to? Note: Its beak is menacigly sharp.

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Aw, aint it cute?

Farhan in his "charming position". All 'mynas' please do not be taken in by his "charm". Note his mohawk hairstyle. Markings of true patriotic Mohawk warrior. We then continued happily posing with the bird.
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Bird poses, Farhan and I

"I want to pose too!" demanded Peter. All right. We reluctantly passed out feathered friend to Peter. He then broke out in a poem. Fyi, hunky 3SG Peter is an intellectual. The perfect catch. Ladies do take note. I'll be glad to do an introduction for a modest fee. :p

"A bird in hand is worth.....ARRRRGHHHHH!"

He never had a chance to finish his sentence. At that very moment that cute tiny winged creature discharged a warm and gooey substance on the palm of his hand. I shall not go on an elaborate description of the "discharge". It then happily hopped off his palm as though nothing has happened. That's its way of thanking its benefactor. Hahaha.
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3 seconds before the bird "unleashed its fury".

3SG Kiam (not in any pictures) then sarcastically finished the poem for him. "Shit in hand I suppose?"

Moral of story: Do not pick up stray birds! Hahaha. Cheers people!

Friday, March 25, 2005

" We are thinking soldiers ah..."

As you faithful readers (u know who u ppl are) would know, I am having a lot of free time for this month. For this month, Mr. Ass-ay-eff pays me to 'work' for 8 hours a day. As for the job scope, see previous entries. Therefore I have decided to give some thoughts about my post-army education during this period of time. I am probably gonna spend a considerable amount of time researching about different courses and finding out more about different institutions as well. Any help or suggestions given will be appreciated! (maybe rewarded too! Hehe.)

Xin Yi, aka.dear dear says, " Aiyoh, you ah, when you are outside, you only complain about army. When you in camp you only think of booking out. Can you spare some time to think about your future? What are you going to do when you ord?"

My usual reply, " I dunno. Aiyah, ord still so far, sure got a lot of time to think one."

Xin Yi, "Hrummph... Forever last minute one you..."

Well, little does dear dear knows, a lot of thinking does go on in army. Well we would think of ways to slack, ways to avoid sai kangs, ways to 'smoke out' from lessons etc. We would also come up with ways to suddenly 'contract' high fever or acute conjunctivitis, thereby enabling us to skip lessons or enjoy a longer weekend. Woops! Hahaha.

For your info, a lot of thinking goes on in the jungles too.

As what our SISPEC warrant officers like to say during our jungle missions,

"Oei soldier! You know how to think ah not hah?
You go chiong in front of the machine gunner you think you who?
Even you rambo you will die ah I tell you!
Use your brain first la!"


"Wei you all shagged(tired) cannot think issit?
The enemy come out dance cha cha finish in front of you,
you all also haven decide what tactics to use yet ah."


"What you doing!
Cannot think issit?
You throw your grenade there you think your grenade is what?
Water bomb ah?
You kill your own ppl than you know ah goon!"

That's thinking in the army for you.

Another issue that we always ponder over is our future or place in the army. No matter which camp you go to or what your vocation is, you will always wonder what is in store for you.

There is a song in Mohawk that goes,

"When I was just a chao recruit,
I ask my sergeant what would I be.
Will I be medic, will I be clerk?
Here's what he said to me.
Oei you chao maggot, whatever will be will be,
The future's not ours to see,
Drop 20 for me."

Familiar song??? Ok. Enough entertainment for now. Back to serious thinking.

So what exactly is in store for me after army? That question never fails to stump me. Should I go to a polytechnic like my Dada suggests, or should i take the A-level slackers route of attending a private uni and get a less-than-recognised degree and hope for a benevolent and magnanimous future employer? Oh well.

Personally I favour the A-level slackers route as I feel that going to a polythechnic means you have wasted 2 years of your education time. But then again, a polytechnic offers you a more hands on approach with a higher rate of employability albeit a lower starting pay than a degree holder.

Arrgh.... How how how?

Sigh. Here I go again. Thinking (more like wondering) about the future.

Sunday, March 20, 2005


Urrgh..... Ouch.... Arrgh.... Ohoooo....

A big fat ugly !@#$%^&* zit-like,
mailicious, agonising, excruciating,
totally annoying and burdensome,
good-for-nothing, pain inducing,
heart-wrenching, uselessly fatiguing,
afflictively hurtful, murderously onerous,
frightfully piercing yet untimely bothersome,
thorny and pricking, long lasting,
stubborn and irremovably tough,
acrid and painfully irritating,
pernicious and rancorous,
ruthless and virulent,

lousy, f***ing piece of ULCER ON MY TONGUE!!!!!!

Urrgh.... Ouch.... The pain....
Arrgh.... Ohoooo....

Saturday, March 19, 2005

LIFE IS BEEAUUTIFUUUUUL.......... (For now lah)

Hahaha.Here I am blogging on a friday afternoon in the comfort and privacy of my own home and computer. Totally awesome! Great music, a can of coke by my side, and most importantly no prying eyes from anyone else in the specialist's mess. Oo yeah.

A quick update on what's been happening recently and what's gonna happen for the next few weeks.

On my 'unfortunate' attachment to 'T' company

It does not seems so bad after all. The "encik"(company sergeant major) takes good care of us. In fact much better than our own CSM. Sheesh. Work there is pretty slack, and we're allowed to go off when the company is not having any physical activities. Hahaha. Slack to the max. Furthermore, we're compensated for our work last Saturday with an off this coming tuesday. Appointments anyone??? Hahaha.Yeah. To add icing to the cake, we're given a super long weekend which explains why I am online at HOME when other instructors are slugging their heads or lungs out. Hahaha.

On MY(but not for long) 'new' recruits

The recruits in 'T' company are definitely much better than the last batch I took. Although they may be less capable in academic terms than the 'scholar' batch that I last took, they are definitely more motivated to do well in their short army career. Furthermore, they are definitely tougher than those JC studs. Too bad next week is my last week with them. Nothing can make a commander work harder for his men than seeing his men putting in their best effort as well. I am confident that this batch of recruits are going to do very well. Keep up the good work all instructors of 'T' company! You all may now take the "KILATOS" (perfect) tag from MOHAWK as we do not have any recruits of our own now. We'll be back to claim back the tag when the time comes. But for now, LULL LOH!!!!!!!!!!!HAHAHAHA!

On my weeks to come

Next week would be the last week of my attachment. Super slack. It would be a short week thanks to the Good Friday public holiday. BOOK OUT ON THURSDAY LOH! The week after that is a period of rest for my company knowned as "lull" period. It is a period of time where the company does not take any recruits, thereby giving the instructors a period of rest. My "lull" would be until April 22 where the next batch of PES C recruits come in. The best thing of the lull period is that it would be an 8-5 stay out routine. Say hello to more suppers! On top of that, I would be clearing 6 days of off during the lull period. Shiok! Party plans anyone??? Juz ask.

On the "work" to do during my 8-5 lull period

Well, I dunno what I'd be doing but here are some of the possibilities:
1. Swim
2. Gym
3. Squash @ SISPEC
4. Badminton
5. Pick up Tennis
6. Basketball (definitely)
7. Sun Tanning
8. Watching endless hours of DVDs
9. Playing X-BOX or PS2 till i get blisters on my thumbs
10. Blogging or Surfing Net at the Specialist's Mess
11. Pool, Fusbal, Darts or Table Tennis at the recruits mess
12. Learning how to play the Keyboard from my Shifu, 3SG Peter Pan
13. Studying (if I can be bothered)
14. Comics and Storybooks
15. If all else fails, book in to Sleep, wake up to book out

That is why life is getting beautiful. Hope you people are having an equally rosy life as I am going to have. Know most of you people are having lotsa tests or projects now. Hang in there, I'm sure you'll get your well deserved periods of rest and enjoyment too. Catch up soon ya?


Friday, March 18, 2005



Hahahaha. See ya folks 2moro!


Saturday, March 12, 2005

ASS-AY-EFF did it again!!!

Yes. Once again I'm at home complaining about the sad and sorry life that I lead. After 13 weeks of hard work of grooming wholesome recruits, the directives from up above ordered our company to attach 5 specialist and an officer to T****s company due to "shortage of manpower" and to help out in the enlistment of their new recruits as well. NONE OF MY BUSINESS WHAT!!!!!!!!

What really pissed me off is not the attachement really, it is the fact that POOR MANGEMENT caused the MISCALCULATION of our company strength, together with the SHORTAGE OF INSTRUCTORS, leading to my getting POSTED there. SHEESH! Was really looking forward to my long weekend when this last minute shit work(sai kang) was thrown to me. There goes my Saturday and Sunday. Darn you maggots!!!!!

Furthermore, our intake on monday is a bunch of PES E recruits in which our company instructors can have a bit of recovery time due to the different nature of their training needs. The posting to another company means that the few of us are depleted from our rest, robbed of our "lull" period, and forced to take a new batch of recruits again WITHOUT REST! Screw you fleabags!!!!!

AM I ROYALLY PISSED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Load of bull this organisation is.
Care of soldiers = Care for recruits ONLY
Meaningful and Memorable my arse.

DIE YOU CHAO MAGGOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Muwahahahahahahahaha!!!!!
(Gives a killer look and pulls off a psychotic evil laugh)
(Raise eyebrows and rub hands together in malevolent joy)
(Corners of the highly malicious smile reaching both ear lobes)

Cant believe that is the new aim of the joint now. "To provide ******** with a meaningful and memorable training experience" Sheesh, for crying out loud! This so called training centre is becoming a holiday chalet or a resort. They are pampered beyond imagination. I cannot forsee how are we gonna have a credible force with the kind of softie training that we provide. To quote from my fren " The chao ******** should just wear skirts and stay at home all day"

I cant help but agree more. With dropping training standards, and lower physical tests passing rates, it is indeed an uphill task to see the "propelling of ASS-AY-EFF to greater heights."New lows and deeper pits are better gauges of where we're headed.

Ok. I have said enough. Im just frustrated by the dysfunctional and pathetic organisation of things.
As I always like to say, "Life is neither perfect, nor fair".
Take that.

Friday, March 11, 2005

Confused? Not me...

"You do ill if you praise, but worse if you censure, what you do not understand." Leonardo da Vinci (1452-1519)

"Therefore I choose neither to praise nor to censure, I choose to seek the truth:P ." Shaun Foo (1985- )

It was a boring Thursday afternoon and I for once have nothing to do, no parties to attend, no friends to meet, no girlfriend to go shopping with and worse still, NO ONE ONLINE TO CHAT WITH!!!!!!!!

Threfore I started to do an online research about the credibility of Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code. And I found out many insights and grey areas of the book. I've also uncovered many articles that gives many an argument about the authenticity of certain topics mentioned.

But I shall not bore you people with what I found out about the book. Instead I chance upon an interesting article that suggest that the "Priory of Sion" still exists today with famous members like JK Rowling included. Hahahaha!!!! That was the funniest thing I've heard since Dan Brown's interpretation of John in the painting of Da Vinci's Last Supper as Mary Magdalene. What a joke!

It may sound absurd. But there are indeed many similarities ideologies about these 2 books that may seem a little too coincidental. However, one should not take the similarities and draw the conclusion that Rowling is a Priory member and/or habours ideas of the "sacred feminine."

Here are some similarities for you to ponder on:

1. In Chapter 79, Dan Brown lists the suspected Grand Masters of the Priory of Scion throughout Medieval to modern times. Nicolas Flamel, the French alchemist, was suspected to be the head from 1398 to 1418. It was reported that Nicolas Flamel discovered the way to transform lead into gold through an ancient text he deciphered over 21 years of study, but this hearsay has little to do with his involvement with the Priory. He is also most noted for the Philosopher's Stone, which many believe he has used to keep him alive even to this day.

* Harry Potter author, J.K. Rowling, made mention of Nicolas Flamel and his Philosopher's Stone in her first novel of the series.

2. O, Draconian devil/ Oh, lame saint : _____________

* I am Lord Voldemort: Tom Marvolo Riddle

3. Mary Magdalene has reddish-brown hair

* Harry mother's name is Lily(the flower of SP), and she too has reddish-brown hair

4. Sophie and her family have green eyes

* So does Harry Potter and his mother.

5. The Da vinci code is a book about the tie of the blood line. When Sophie hugs her brother at the end of the book, she feels the shared bloodline.

* It's kind of similar to the basic theme in Harry Potter (his mother's blood protects him from Voldie). It's basically a story about bloodline too.

Hahaha. A little bit of coincidence there eh? Well. That's all I can find out for now. But seriously speaking, if you ask me, both books are but two very intelligent and original works that MAKE good uses of facts. Both books however remain fictitious and should remain nothing more than good bedtime reads. I, personally do not believe in any of the ideologies presented in either of these two books. I have my reservations and sources to back what I believe.

But then again, isn't reading all about discretion? Hahaha. Fact or Fiction? you decide folks!

Sunday, March 06, 2005

P.O.P goes the first batch!

In case you folks have been wondering why I have not been blogging for the past 2 weeks, well its because I've been real busy with work. Furthermore there were only very short weekends which I hardly have enough time to enjoy or rest, much less to blog. I still think I am underpaid for all the things I do and all the weekends that I've burnt. Hrummph. Anyway, in a short fortnight, we have completed the whole range package, walked the 16km route march and started rehearsing for the graduation parade held later this week on Wednesday.

In a blink of an eye, 13 weeks have flown by. Seems like only yesterday that my first batch of recruits have enlisted. From super unfit and lazy JC students, the 13 weeks in MOHAWK have turned them into fighting fit soldiers ready to take on challenges in their future units or schools. There is a sense of pride knowing that you have played a part in the recruits' achievement of their ippt golds, company best shots, and most importantly, their entry to OCS or SISPEC. That is the reward of being a BMTC instructor, the groomer of future leaders in the army.

In a nutshell, I have been in rather poor health for the past 2 weeks. Sore throats, flus and coughs are common irritants that were bugging me lately.
Maybe its because I have been screaming at the recruits too much since the range package. Oops. Heh. Furthermore, there is an invasion of legions of mosquitoes at night these days due to the reclaiming of land just across the instructors bunk near the sea. The uneven land traps rainwater and becomes instantly a production factoy for millions of mossies. No!!!!!! Stoopid contractors. It is now illegal to sleep without your blanket and a mosquito coil by your side nightly. Ignorants of these safety measures find themselves covered with itchy 20-cent coin bites the next morning. Sheesh. Hope the work ends soon. The coils are costing a bomb!!!!!!

My new motto for the rest of the army is "Body For Life" as influenced by my next door bunk mates who are really into body building. Haha. Just last week I have measured the size of my biceps. A puny 12" compared to their average of 14". Haha. Looks like more gym sessions are in order during lull period. I am also trying to cut down on my carb intake and go for more protein instead. Haha. It is certainly nice to have "personal trainers" within your reach anytime.
I also gotta start training for my ippt. Next two batches are Pes E recruits followed by Pes C ones. Therefore, one has to be very commited to self-training in order to preserve their personal fitness.

Yes! 4 more days to P.O.P (passing out parade)! I will definitely miss my smart bunch of JC recruits. But I am definitely looking forward to taking the next batch of recruits and once again nurture the fighting force in our army. Will be walking the 24km route march on Monday. Sheesh. Just realised that I have many more 24km route marches to go. Hahaha. Oh well. Book in time! Till next weekend folks. Adios!